We're finally reaching temps over 20F here in Utah (it's been below zero or near it at night and highs in the teens during the day)! Saturday it reached 35F and it was wonderful; I wondered outside and took photos of the ice cycles hanging off the drain pipes! The sky was such a gorgeous blue, as you can see in the photo below.

Yesterday reached a high of 42F the warm front brought a storm with it, in which they're expecting up to a foot in the valleys and 3 feet in the mountains. Yee haw. I'm not looking forward to the commute but am happy to have warmer temps, it's been so cold and my joints haven't been happy.

I even caught a cold but managed to nip it before it got too bad. The weekend was pretty good; yesterday was Mom's birthday and I cooked dinner and made four pies. My siblings (except Kathy) came over and some of their kids. I have new pics of my cute little grand niece, Eli (who is growing so big!) but they're still on my camera... and may stay there until the weekend because I have a lot of work to catch up on at work and I'm tired just thinking about it all. ;-)

Last week was good but so busy at work due to the Interviewing Skills workshop I'm involved in teaching. I ran the mock interviews and that was so fun; I had a great group of guys and although they learned a lot, we had a lot of laughs too. I was thanked by my coworkers for organizing it so well and the students mentioned how great the mock interviews were on their critiques, which made me feel good.

I'm rambling, aren't I?

OK... have a great day!

 

The Kiss of Peace, a photo taken by Julia Margaret Cameron in 1869, has stood the test of time and human emotion did not change from generation to generation.  The photo represents not only peace but also unconditional love between a mother and child, which has not faded through the centuries. 
Self-Portrait

According to Robert Leggat, this particular portrait is of her sister, Maria (Mia) Jackson and is one of Mrs. Cameron’s most famous portraits.  The portrait of a mother and daughter is based on the biblical story of the Visitation; the daughter is looking down as the mother kisses her brow and looks on.   A mother kissing a child’s brow is both universal and eternal; a true masterpiece.

When I see The Kiss of Peace portrait, I feel raw human emotions, hope for a better future, and the greatest peace of all, the unbreakable bond of love.  The portrait is somber yet portrays eternal beauty and reminds me of how safe and loved I felt in my mother’s arms.  The Kiss of Peace stirs my emotions; it makes me hope we could hold on to that kind of love for all humankind, to make our world a better place.  The portrait brings forth a yearning for peace, reminding me that peace begins at home.  

When I look closely into the mother’s eyes, I see that she is afraid and concerned for their future but wants to protect her child from harm and assure her she will be protected.  As most mothers, she is willing to die for her child and Mrs. Cameron captures the protective quality exquisitely.

Mrs. Cameron’s photos convey spirituality, romanticism, and core human emotions; her style is timeless.  She managed to capture what many people were feeling at the time and we, in the current time, feel the emotions as well.  Most of her photos focus on women and allegorical lessons and are centered on the important women in her life.  She focused on the natural beauty of the women she photographed, showing their hair down, which was not often seen outside of the home.   

Mrs. Cameron used large glass plate negatives, often used for landscapes for her portraits.  Using this type of negatives, her subjects had to be still for several moments, which of course, was difficult.  This technique left the photos out of focus, giving the portraits a soft and dreamy feeling.

The subjects of Mrs. Cameron’s photos were her passion since she did not care for action photography.  Most of her well-known portraits were famous men, although as society has changed, the portraits of the women have increased in popularity.

Hundreds of thousands of our ancestors and forefathers had big dreams for the United States as well as from other Mother Lands.  The dreams were to improve their lives and childrens' lives, to be free and to enjoy what they fought hard to accomplish.  I am grateful for leaders who led countries for everyone's benefits, not their own, however if they led for their own dreams, they weren't really "leaders."  

I am reminded of history classes where I learned what others sacrificed for us to be able to live free.  However, history doesn't always bring to mind the realization of the passion that they felt and how hard they really worked.  When I see a photo such as this, it puts a face to every person who worked hard and should be recognized for their part in our world today.  It's not a perfect world but it is ours to change, just as it was their world to change.  (click on photo to EMBIGGEN)

 

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September to May, you live in Utah.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Utah.

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Utah

 If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number, you live in Utah.

If 'vacation' means going anywhere south of Salt Lake City for the weekend, you live in Utah.

If you measure distance in hours, you live in Utah.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Utah.

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' and back again in the same day, you live in Utah.

If you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both unlocked, you live in Utah.

 If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Utah.

 If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Utah.

If the speed limit on the highway is 75 mph -- you're going 80, and everyone is still passing you, you live in Utah.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you live in Utah.

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you live in Utah.

If you find 10 degrees 'a little chilly' you live in Utah.

If you actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your friends, you live in Utah.

Please help me decide which four photos I should enter into the 11th Black & White Competition 2008 at the Ogden's Eccles Community Art Center. Thank you!!

Rose of Utah

Distant Memories

Go the Distance

Summer Daisies

Moose at Big Springs in BW

Ben Lomond BW 1

Ben Lomond BW 2

Water in Action

From a Faucet

Out of the Rough

White on Black

Mommy & Eli

Rest for the Weary

The past few months, I have struggled with finding energy to do all I want.  I know a large part of my lack of energy is due to my Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA) and other auto-immune diseases fatigue, however, I wonder if some of it has to do with not being in school and not having the drive to get more done.  I find that as difficult as it was to adjust to go to go school that it's just as difficult not to go to school. 

Before I had the auto-immune diseases, I did not have a clue about how exhausted one could be.  Back then, being tired was fixed by a 15 minute power nap or sitting down for a bit.  Pain was something I could take an Aleve and it would go away.  Ah, those were the days. 

Since I was diagnosed with RA eight years ago, my eyes were opened to the horror that people who suffer any of the auto-immune disease, such as MS, RA, Crohns, Lupus, UC, and the list goes on.  I never imagined the pain and fatigue I was going to face and it's a good thing I did not know then.  I no longer sympathized but emphasized with others who suffer the same ailments. 

Friday morning, I went to the physical therapy pool and worked out for two hours then had a nice sit in the hot tub.  If I have not mentioned this before, the pool is my Friday morning 'ME TIME" addiction.  I wish I could go every day or better yet, had a pool of my own.  As much as I love the pool, it's a bugger getting out, which I call "reality hitting."  I feel so good in the water, virtually no pain at all; it feels as if I don't have RA. 

As I was sitting in the hot tub, a new lady entered the pool and we said hello to one another.  We talked about why each of us was there and it turns out, we were there for the same reason.  She has RA and is in a lot of pain and is amazed at how wonderful the pool makes her feel.  We exchanged info about medications and other remedies since she's only had RA for a year or so and was grateful for all I told her.  She said that she's so afraid that she's going to be in pain forever and never get relief. 

I fear the same.  However, I am fortunate that Remicade, prednisone (EVIL drug), and Imuran are working well for me.  I'm on a high dose and as of Wednesday, a notch higher, which is one notch away from maximum dose.  In 2003, I was almost in a wheel chair and the medications made it possible for me to live a decent life and for that, I'm eternally grateful.  The medications I take also treat the ulcerative colitis and have given me that part of my life back.  I fear for the future; as well as I am doing now, what if the unthinkable happens?  What if the RA spreads to my organs?  What if I get more auto-immune diseases?  I try to stay focused on here and now but those questions are always in the back of my mind. 

When I was first diagnosed, I was angry at God for yet another hurdle I had to over come and I wanted to know why I was being punished.  I was angry at the world.  I was angry.  I put myself on a pity pot and stayed there until others helped me and that I began to see that having RA was not the end of my life.  I began to say, "There is NO way was I letting my life end at 32."  I struggled for a while longer, had ups and downs, but slowly, more positive thoughts entered my mind.  I learned to allow myself a pity pot day on occasion and get the negativity out because those feelings were hurting me bottled up and setting them free allowed the positive back in.

I believe everything happens for reasons and although I may not be thrilled with the reason I have auto-immune diseases, I am thrilled that I have an incredible support network.  Two main supports are my dear friends Vickie and Dawn and although I wish they did not have the diseases to understand what I go through, I'm grateful to have them in my life.  They know the fatigue I deal with because they face it themselves.  Both ladies are inspirations to me with their positive and kick-ass attitudes; they never let me down and are always there no matter how tired they are.  We usually have a few laughs along with a few tears.

Vickie and I laugh about that fact that when we call and ask how one another is, undoubtedly, "tired" will be the answer for at least one or both of us. When we say "tired," we mean, bone tired, barely have the strength to hold the phone to our ears, tired.  However, the laughter has a magical way of pumping some breath into our lungs and it spreads to the rest of our bodies.

I started this post as an explanation of how tired I am and why I haven't been around to visit much - if at all.  I apologize for that and I am hoping with all my might that my energy will return and I can begin visiting.  Right now, I get home from work, answer my email, eat dinner (which is usually cereal because I'm too tired to cook LOL), shower, then head to bed and watch TV/talk on the phone until I fall asleep.  My weekends are filled with things I don't get done during the week.   It's a vicious cycle... one that I WILL break.

Now to change the subject... 

Most of my day yesterday, I spent getting some photos ready for a competition at the Eccles Community Art Center to be submitted on Friday.  I need help in deciding which four to submit and if it's not too much trouble, could you come back tomorrow and vote for the four you like best to help me decide?  

Speaking of Eccles Community Art Center, I received a letter Saturday announcing that my English/Art teacher bought me a membership for 2008.  Carol-Ann is definitely one teacher I shall never forget; she's more than a teacher, she's my friend.  I called to thank her and we talked for over an hour catching up.  I'm going to attend the open house on February 1 when they'll announce the winners of the black and white photo contest.  I am excited to be a part of this art center and learn more about art and photography.   

Last weekend, my friend Linda and I went to the movie, P.S. I Love You, and while I was waiting for her in the lobby, I noticed this display and couldn't help but giggle about the phallic sillouette.  *snicker*  I snapped a photo (click to EMBIGGEN *snortle*) while getting weird looks from the movie theatre staff... then Linda came out of the restroom and I showed her and we both giggled as we walked to the theatre where our movie was playing.  We are so easily entertained and it's clear what is on our minds. 

We also had some laughs over my new scarf that my aunt got me for Christmas; it is a polyester fluffy scarf that is SO wonderful and silky.  Linda had to feel it (the scarf) and when she did, she said, "Ohhh my... that IS sexy."  Then she went on about moisture... I didn't really follow that.  *snicker* 

P.S.  the movie was wonderful; quite a tear jerker but I loved it.   

Now, there is actually something else the title of this post represents, besides the above two paragraphs.  North Ogden, where I live, got well over 21 inches of snow yesterday.  We got the brunt of the all day storm when Ogden, a short distance away) only got 6 inches.  However, I don't believe that because I had to drive through a good ten inches to run an errand for my parents and a doctor appointment.  No one was going over 25mph... well, that is, no one who stayed on the road!  

This morning was a mess getting to work - the photo to the left is right after I got to work and trudged through the snow to the front door.   There was about six inches but the condition of the road, I thought there was a lot more.  There was an inch+ sheet of ice under the snow.  The drivers that stayed on the road didn't go over 40 mph and at times, no more than 20mph on the freeway.  I was thankful to get to work! 

I left work an hour before my Remicade treatment was scheduled, which is usually a 15 minute drive from work.  Most the traffic lights were covered in snow.  I had to go to one doc's office to get some meds for Dad, which was fun, I almost got stuck in the parking lot.  I did good though, Dad taught me well; I rocked back and forth and got out.  After that, I had 20 minutes to get to my Remicade appointment... I pulled into the hospital parking lot five minutes late but I got a really good parking place.  I tell you - Someone was watching out for me today.  As dangerous as it was out today, it was so beautiful.  See why I love the snow? 

The roads were decent after my doctor appointment - except when I got to North Ogden then it was fun, fun, fun.  I was chatting with Vickie on my phone (using my hands-free!) when I said, "Holy shit.  I gotta gun it because I'm going through two feet of snow," when I turned on the road before my street.  I couldn't go more than 5mph through the twists and turns and she got all the commentary!  I waved to a guy who I thought was a family friend but it wasn't him... but he was cute.  LOL  He must have thought he knew me because he had a big grin on his face. I'm such a dork.

I turned on my street and it was a lot better than the last and I backed in my driveway with no issues... unless you count scraping the pile of snow with my car.  It looked just like someone cut the snow with a knife.  Ah well.  I took my things into the house and went back out with my camera to get some shots of the huge piles of snow around the house.  It was amazing - it's been years since I've seen that much snow at one time.  Now this is a Utah winter.   

The little black thing in the photo on the left is my across-street neighbor's mail box.  The pile of snow in the front is my mailbox. The puffs surrounding the gray siding is a bit of my house's roof. 

After I finished having fun taking photos in the front of the house, I went to the back yard.  I noticed Mom's flowering plums were bent all the way down to the snow level; they're at least 7 feet tall.  Since I still had my boots and coat on, I went out back to rescue the flowering plums.  That sounds simple, huh?  You should know by now that with me, nothing is simple.  More about that in a minute.  On my way out to rescue the plums, I took more photos.  There are descriptions under the photos. 

Snow on the railing of the deck 
Antique plow in garden, 3 feet tall

Cool ice cycles on fitzer
Snow on a garden hoseI made my way down the stairs of the deck, despite the 4 inches of snow on them since my very generous brother cleaned them earlier.  At the bottom of the deck, there was about a foot-wide strip where there was very little snow before I began trudging in the snow so high, it was above my knees.  OK, didn't plan on this, but I had cozy socks on and I figured my legs would be OK for a couple of minutes while setting the flowering plums free from their snow traps.  Uh huh. 

I got about two feet when one foot slid under my other when I hit the pocket of icey snow under the fresh stuff and I had myself a seat made from snow.  As I sat there squatting and unable to find a stable enough place to put my hands so I could get up, my ass and my legs became reallllllly cold and realllllly wet.  I sat there and giggled at my prediciment; only I could get myself into such a position.  Mom was in the kitchen fixing dinner for Dad when I decided to call for help. 

She asked if I left my camera in the house so she could take a photo.  Yeah, that would have been reallllly funny.  ;-)  Luckily, the camera was in my coat pocket, safe and dry.  She pointed out the fact that the barbeque grill was back and to my left a bit then proceeded to tell me, "Why don't you clean off the show from that with the broom in your hand and use that to push yourself up with?"  

Where I fell and trompedMighty fine idea, especially because my knees have been killing me lately and I wasn't about to do a face-first dive if I were to roll over.  Voila.  It worked.  Mom is brilliant.  After that, I made my way to the flowering plums and freed them - minus a few branches.  I only stumbled one more time but luckily the broom broke my fall.  As I made my way back to the deck and back to a warm house where I could get out of my cold and wet jeans and panties to have a nice, HOT shower, I looked back at where I'd been and could only laugh and thought, gee whiz...  now that was fun!

It's been a funky week.  The work week seemed to be longer than a normal week with one day short due to the holiday.  Most of the week was waaaaay below freezing in the single and teen digits.  Brrr.  I could hardly wait for this weekend for it to warm up and give us snow.  today's storm was beautiful and dumped a lot of snow and we're supposed to keep getting snow all week with just a short break between storms.  I'm not complaining because we need the snow and compared to Idaho's snow removal services - Utah rocks.  ;-) 

Snowy days are the best when I can stay home and curl up with a blanket and watch the snow fall.   However, when I looked out the window across the street, I saw a genuine Utah Snow Angel...  and it ruined it for me.  *snortle*  Not really... this is something I got in my email.  What a hoot. 

The tree is one of the lovely sites I saw looking out my window and I had to get dressed (it was a PJ day) in my sweats to go out and take some photos. 

One thing about the snow is that it makes my sexy man, D, busier at work.  He's been in and out of state all week so I haven't been able to talk to him much.  I swear, my patience is getting tested - not with him but with the lack of talking, etc.  No translations on the "etc"... I'll just say, uh hum, gee whiz.

Some of you may have noticed my domain was down for a few days.  Hmmm.  Thanks to Ms. Vickie calling me and telling me that she got the GoDaddy screen from her Google Reader instead of my blog but she could get to my blog via her blogroll (which was the url http://passionsofmyheart.squarespace.com/ not the http://www.passionsofmyheart.com).  Hmmm.  Then it dawned on me that my domain expired so I checked online and sure enough, it expired on Dec 29.  Ooops.  I didn't get any renewal notices but after further investigation, I discovered I used my MSN email address not my gmail.  I confess that I do not check my MSN email but once a month when I get a nasty note saying I haven't checked my email in 30 days.  Ooops. The email is now my gmail email address. 

Then I went to pay the fee for renewal and I could not log into PayPal.  I use PayPal when available since it's safer than having things automatically renew with my debit/credit card.  I ended calling customer service to get my PayPal account straightened out because I was not getting the email to reset my password... which ended up being that I had a PayPal email address blocked but also had one in the safe mail.  Go figure that Hotmail works so well with the blocked emails.  So an hour later, I finally had the renewal paid.  

Can anything in my life be easy?  Apparently not these past funky few days.   

That's it for me for now - I need to get my behind in bed to get some sleep so I'm ready for my long workday and fun drive into work.  I hope you all had  a great weekend and here's hoping this week will be a lot better than last week.  Remember to smile, it makes others wonder what you're up to.