Yesterday I received the news that a good friend of mine died; she and I knew one another since 7th grade, when my life became fuller because of her.  Suzanne Orton, 40, died last Tuesday, February 12, 2008,  peacefully at her home, according to the obituary.  When "at home" is mentioned in obituaries, most the time it means by the person's own hand, however, I refuse to believe she did anything to cause her death.  I feel it in my heart and soul. 

In our early 20's, Suzy was plagued with trauma from her childhood, such trauma that she developed multiple personality disorder.  Within five years, she took control of the MPD and no longer needed medication.  She had a strong faith in God and she forgave her abuser, which gave her the power to overcome it all.  I kept in touch with Suzy, usually via Christmas cards and the occasional phone call and/or email.  I am proud to call her friend and she helped me through one of the toughest times in my life, for which I will be forever grateful. 

I carry all the memories and laughter in my heart; she had such a way about her, she could always make me laugh.   

Suzy was a friend like no other,
She was kind, cheerful, and true to another.

Suzy had a true inner strength,
A strength she shared at length.

She was full of life and laughter,
Her antics had me laughing for hours after.

Suzy’s heart was filled with empathy and compassion,
It was no secret that those she loved were her passion.

She listened with her heart and soul,
And in her company, I was never alone.

She was there when I needed a friend,
And soon, she had me laughing, again and again.

Not matter what she went through in her younger years,
She fought hard to overcome her pain and fears.

Suzy had an incredible spirit, which glowed from within,
That spirit still shines today, for it will never end.

Suzy will be remembered for her Christ-like ways,
A true inspiration to me, then, now, and always.

I will carry her memory within my heart,
Now that she is safe, loved, and at peace in His loving arms. 

Rest in peace, my friend; I love you with all my heart,
Karen
 

Sometimes it takes me a MACK truck to wake up to all that is going on around me and to my friends.  Last week started out as a good week, until Tuesday when I let an old boss get the best of me.  However, I stood my ground and emailed him as well as several others stating that I did not appreciate how he treated me and I felt that he was wrong in doing so.  Turns out, I was right.  Not that I wanted to win because accusations, assumptions, and other factors always seem to cause nothing but trouble.  I am proud for the way I dealt with this individual, whom I refer to as "The Lord of the Flies" on my FLICKR site.  In this case, the flies weren't attracted to honey but something much more offending. 

Last week was the second week in a row that I had to deal with a jerk and there better not be a third week. 

While I was dealing with this situation and others that cropped up during the week, I missed some important events.  Deni's poor kitties had to be put down due to a rabid raccoon and she herself is undergoing the shots in case her sweet kitty, Noodles, was infected by the raccoon.  I know these kitties were more than pets - they were her babies and my heart breaks for her.  Monica is taking a break from blogging because of her son may be battling lymphoma for the second time.  She needs to focus on him and getting him well.  Vickie's mom is in kidney failure and it is taking its toll on her.  Dawn is also having a hard time right now.  All are so special to me and I ask that you keep them in your thoughts.

I'm sure there's more going on and I don't want to exclude anyone but I have not been able to visit as I want to.  My point is that I seem to get buried in my own pile of sand while others are drowning around me.  My dad's his late twin sister's daughter got married on Friday and my parents asked me to drive them to South Salt Lake for the wedding luncheon.  I thought of all I had to do this weekend and actually hesitated before saying yes.  There were a dozen reasons for saying no but they were all selfish and I'm glad I made the right choice.

My cousin literally broke out in a sob when she saw my dad walk through the door of the restaurant.  She hugged him tightly and introduced Dad to her husband, proudly.  She's always felt closer to Dad than the other siblings, probably because of him being her mom's twin and the connection they had.  Dad misses his sister every day and I know it did him good to see Jeanette happy.  As I sat next to Dad, he was so happy, he was glowing.  Then it hit me.

All we need is love.  Love from family and friends. 

I knew it before, however, I obviously need to be reminded.  It's more than the Thanksgiving and Christmas seasons when I take notice of all I have to be grateful for, it's what I need to remember every minute of every day.  Focus on the beauty  and love in life... not the flies.

My dad is slowly disappearing and I feel so helpless because I am unable to fight for him.  Parkinson's disease is taking him away from us.  He has good days but lately, it seems as if it's more bad days.  Yesterday, he couldn't remember my name and it made him feel so bad and it made me feel bad too.  I hugged him and said, "Just call me Kammy as you always used to.  I liked it when you called me Kammy."  He laughed and hugged me back and as I pulled away, he had a tear in his eye.  All I can do is love him and tell him how much he means to me... which is the most important thing.  No one or anything can ever take away that love.   

I do not understand how someone can abandon an animal - it's beyond my comprehension - especially an animal unable to protect itself and gather food (she was declawed).  A few weeks ago, I posted about this kitty, who was abandoned and who decided to adopt me.  However, I could not give her a home.  I called animal services to pick her up but that was unsuccessful.  The Animal Control Officer said he would be back that afternoon with a live trap.  That did not happen.  Days then weeks went by with no trap and no response to follow-up phone calls.  She is a beautiful cat and very loving, but when she feels threatened, whether justified or not, she bit me several times.  However, I came to the conclusion she cannot protect herself any other way. 

I continued to feed her because I could not stand to see her starve.  I continued to pet her because all she wanted was love.  It nearly ripped my heart out when she hid in my garage at night to be safe from other cats in the neighborhood.  

When the nights began to cool, I knew I needed to find her a home.  I asked everyone I could think of if they wanted her but alas, they did not or could not take her.  With a heavy heart, I decided I needed to take her to the animal shelter where she can be adopted.  I tried one last time to contact the North Ogden Animal Control Officer but he is out of the office for several weeks  They did not have anyone filling in for him and they told me to take her to the Ogden Animal Shelter. 

I put her in Ashley's old carrier and put her in my car and cried the whole way.  When I arrived, 15 minutes later, I was still quite emotional and angry that I had to do this.  The workers at the shelter told me it was a $25 fine to bring a cat in since I live in North Ogden - not Ogden.  I refused.  She was not my cat and I do not believe I should pay for someone else's heartlessness.  I also refused to take her back home.  We had a problem.

One of the workers called North Ogden City and spoke with the ASSistant Chief (of Police) Kevin Warren.  He asked to speak to me on the phone and I explained my position and gave him details of how many times I called North Ogden City to have her picked up.  Here I was, doing THEIR job.  He told me, and I quote, "You trapped the cat, so it's your problem."  I dropped the phone on the desk (oops) and said, "That's our tax dollars hard at work," as the worker said good-bye to the officer.   By then, I was livid, which isn't a good thing because when I'm emotional, the anger turns me into a blubbering idiot. 

The workers were so nice and they were as frustrated as I was because they too hate it when irresponsible people who have no scruples and morals abandon an animal.   

When I returned home, I wrote a 1.5 page letter to North Ogden City and all the officials, to tell my story and express my disgust for their lack of help, especially those words by ASSt. Chief Kevin Warren.  His words and tone will ring in my ears forever.   

As I was talking to Vickie about it on the phone one day, she suggested writing a letter to the editor.  Brilliant, Vickie!  :-D  I did so and I got a call three days after I submitted it, to tell me that it was accepted.  It appeared in yesterday's paper (click to EMBIGGEN).

Over the weekend, I received a letter from the North Ogden City Administrator, whom the Mayor asked to respond to me.  The gentleman agreed that there is a problem with strays and he thanked me for my letter (I bet it made his day!).  He said he would address the situation with ASSistant Chief Kevin Warren and Jerry Wade, the Animal Control Officer (when he returns).  Who knows - perhaps something will come out of it, even if it makes the ASSt Chief Kevin Warren think about how he treats others.  

As for the kitty, I gave her to my sister, who lives in Ogden.  She ended up taking her to the shelter because she got bit trying to get her out of the carrier.  Since she lives in Ogden, she did not get fined.  The workers at the shelter didn't think they'd have any trouble finding her a home, especially since she was declawed and fixed.  They said she would make an excellent companion to someone who had time to work with her on the biting issue.  Since she was abandoned, they said it's normal for a cat to turn feral quickly out of self-preservation, but she is definitely domesticated. 

If the ASSistant Chief Kevin Warren happens to read this, I want to express again how grateful I am for him and his courteous and respectful assistance.  He certainly has reinforced my view of police and how they help citizens.  Bravo, ASSt Chief Warren, what a job well done.

For those of you who have followed Hula's posts about the five children she rescued from an abusive mother, there is some heart-wrenching news.  The baby, Alex, was  hospitalized with RSV and he died Wednesday night.  I could go on and rant about his circumstances but I won't, this is about a sweet little boy who died.

I share Hula's tears  and heartache, as well as all those who mourn this innocent child.   May he now know true love and joy and be free from his illness and environment.

 Rest in peace, sweet Alex.

(photo is from at www.unseenwings.com)