I sit here with my heart full, perhaps fuller than it has ever been.  There was so many blessings this year along with hard times and losses.  I remember my 2007 New Year started with coming out of my bedroom that morning, on my way to my bathroom, and I was startled by my dad standing in my way.  There stood the man that I love with all my heart, who the so-called physicians at Ogden Regional Hospital said would never walk without assistance again after his 9-week hospitalization.  The physical therapists never gave up, we never gave up and most importantly, Dad never gave up.  As my eyes filled with tears, I hugged my dad to make sure it was not a dream.  He had walked down the 14 stairs to my basement to tell me that he finished his physical therapy; mastering the stairs was his last hurdle.  During last Christmas, my family kept calling Dad our Christmas miracle because along with the negative assumptions of his walking was also accompanied by the assumptions that Dad would never regain his mental faculties.  He showed them!  We're so thankful for his new doctors and for all the blessings we've had this year.  Although we still face a battle every day, he's worth it.  Laughter and love go hand-in-hand in our family and he is the root of it all. 

The first ten months of the year sped by and most everything is a blur due to me taking the toughest classes of the four years I went to school.  I sacrificed a lot over the past four years but I was determined to finish my bachelors... and I did in October.  I have my beautiful diploma but my family is waiting to celebrate it on June 14, when the graduation ceremony is scheduled. 

My nephew Tyler and his wife, Sara, brought a sweet baby boy, Caleb, into the world last summer.  Then my nephew Travis and his wife, Sara, brought sweet Eli into the world and despite having a rough start, Eli thrives.  My niece Keldi and her husband Matt are expecting their second boy this April.  Our family is growing and it's awesome to see the people I love thrive and grow.  My niece Elyssa started a special school program and her teachers agree that she is indeed, brilliant; she just cannot say all she wants to.  There is still no diagnosis but we're focusing on her growing and being happy. 

The loser, Elyssa's so-called-father (we call him the sperm donor) was released to a half-way-house in early December.  My sister called the facility where he was held and made it clear that he was not living with her.  Although she hasn't gotten a divorce yet, it's a big step for her to say "no" to him.  He tries calling her often but she ignores the calls.  Kathy suffers from bi-polar and she's had a rough time of it for the past few weeks due to a medication change but she's starting to come out of it.  I know in my heart that if she gets strong enough to divorce him, she can do anything.  The school, bus drivers, and aides have all been warned about him, in case he tries anything.  I'd actually like to have him try something... because he'd land himself back in prison. 

I am grateful for all of my family.  I drove my parents to Idaho Falls, Idaho, Friday for my Aunt Lou Jean's 80th birthday celebration.  The weather was snowy but we made it there safely and back home Saturday, despite Idaho's *cough, cough* so-called snow removal services.  The celebration was wonderful and she deserved such a lovely party.  Cousins, aunts, uncle, were there; local and those who traveled from California, Utah, and Washington.  There is so much love in my family and as I hugged those who I have not seen in years, there was no love loss.  I enjoyed catching up with them all and was honored to be part of the celebration for Lou Jean.  Not many 80 year-olds can still hula like she can. 

In other news, I met someone special at the end of October and I've hesitated in sharing it on my blog - mostly because I did not want to jinx it, however, he is part of the reason why my heart is so full.  His name is David and he's the "special friend" who lost his sister recently.  The outpour of love and support for him has not only helped him and his family but it's made me appreciate you all the more.  David is an incredible man and we have a lot of hopes for the coming year.  He has two children, a daughter (who lives with her mother) and a son (who lives with David) and he is an incredible father, which makes me adore him even more.  He's funny, sensitive, romantic (he blows my mind), caring, and strong.  He actually lives in Utah (only an hour away from me), which means I was wrong when I said, "There are not any straight, great, handsome, sexy, available men in Utah who are not dorks."   He is a little nutty because he loves my sense of humor and he indulges my *snicker* moments.  Our time together has been limited due to work conflicts and the tragedy of his sister's death, but we're patient because we know our relationship is worth waiting and fighting for. The man makes me swoon.......... even through a text message. I wonder where he's been all my life and he asked me the same; however, I know that we've both been on our own journey and the journeys finally met.  

My life is full of incredible friends - each one is special to me and I'm so blessed to have them in my life.  I wish the very best of health, happiness, and peace for each of my friends in this new year.  You all are my friends and I appreciate the love and support you've shown me over the years; you've kept me strong and I've never felt alone with you all by my side.

It's been a year full of discovering and igniting passions within myself and it feels great to feel free enough to explore the person I want to become. I am a work-in-progress and have the self-love to continue the work; my self-esteem has always been low but it's getting higher. I believe that I cannot truly love another without first loving myself. It's been a year now since I opened this place, where I share my thoughts and passions. Again, I thank you all for your friendship and for your part in my journey.

I have a request for a friend of mine, Suzanne.  Her mother passed away yesterday morning and I ask that you keep her and her family in your thoughts.